"Then it should be easy for a man like you, with all your experience at solving problems on the shop floor, to come up with a blog for our website," said Jones.

Instead of "No, thanks," what came out of my mouth was: "Of course. Nothing could be easier."

"Drat. Double drat!!" cursed the Sleuth.

Got to get hold of myself What am I trying to do here? Tell people there 'S a new way of thinking about metrology, that's what. Sounds easy enough. People in manufacturing plants are measuring things all over the place. And that's a good thing. But they do it in so many different ways. So what Joe measures may not help Bill and vice versa. That's a bad thing.

They're using so many different types of measuring systems--CMMs, vision systems, even measuring things with probes on their CNCs. And then there are all those different measurement programs and analysis programs sending results to different databases ... and finally there's all that different reporting software. So little commonality, and so much inefficiency. But it doesn't have to be that way. And it won't. Now we have super-fast computers and networks, and we live in an interactive world. So ... So ... So how am I going write this in a simple way that people will relate to?

Even worse, a more urgent deadline was approaching with unforgiving swiftness. Tomorrow would be brunch at his sister's house, and he still hadn't gotten a Valentine's Day gift for Annette, his favorite niece. His only hope of avoiding this embarrassment was putting his computer to sleep and rushing over to the place he knew for sure would have the largest supply of Valentine's Day paraphernalia--the Mega Drugstore.

When he got to the gift and greeting card section, he gasped. The shelves, once jam-packed with items (just as brain was once overflowing with good ideas), were all picked over. Now what?

It was at this moment that he saw something that would solve both of his problems. Over in the toy aisle, extended on a string from the ceiling, and making a wide circle on gossamer wings, was a beautiful battery-operated flying pig. It was emblematic of one of his favorite sayings and a running joke between him and his niece.

Annette was always saying things like "Uncle Sleuth, when the Lions go to the Super Bowl, will you take me to the game?" or "When I'm old enough to drive, are you going to let me use your car?" The answer was always the same--"When pigs learn to fly, dear girl."

Sleuth hastily gathered up a boxed pig and a write-your-own-verse greeting card with cuddly puppies on front. Sleuth was now confident that he and his niece would be having a good laugh on Valentine's Day morning. He smiled as he left the MegaDrugstore. Not only was the flying pig a great gift, it was also the perfect "hook" for the Enterprise Metrology Blog.

Soon he was back at his computer with a steaming cup of coffee. He typed with enthusiasm:

"When pigs learn to fly!"

"Ten years ago, that was my standard answer when manufacturing or quality guys asked this metrology detective such futuristic questions as:

"When will I be able to use just one measurement software package to program all of my measurement systems so I can reduce training costs and improve the comparability of data?

"When will measurement software products generate their own part programs using the data that is available on the CAD model?

"When will we be able to program our vision systems using CAD models just like we do with our CMMs?

"When will we be able to take measurement data that is available all over the plant, collect it into a single database and use the data to generate any kind of manufacturing process analysis or report as needed?

"When will I be able to write CMM-like measurement routines for my machine tools so we can do critical in-process checks using CNC probing capabilities?

"When will inspection planning be paperless, so we don't always have to be dealing with marked up drawings that may or may not be sent along with the CAD model?

"When will we close the loop on the design process so that dimensional data is automatically shuttled back to the CAD system to verify design intent?

"Well now I can't use my standard answer anymore. With today's fast computers, open technologies, and networks, those pigs are actually learning to fly ... and they're coming home to roost."

EM is here to stay

Enterprise Metrology is an emerging discipline that relies on advanced computer hardware, metrology software, and networking technology to streamline the generation of measurement programs while improving the collection, storage and flow of data, analyses, and reports among various disciplines, including design, manufacturing, quality and the supply chain. In addition to improving the effectiveness of measurement systems, Enterprise Metrology is an essential tool for achieving the lean manufacturing objectives of enterprise-wide improvements in productivity and reductions in scrap generation

EM Sleuth is sponsored by' Wilcox Associates Inc (www.pcdmis-ems.com), part of the Hexagon Metrology Group and makers of PC-DMIS measurement software. Contributors to this article include: Steve Logee, Director of Business Development, Wilcox Associates This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it ; Rob Fabiano, Sleuth illustrator, This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it and Joel Cassola, writer, This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it